A dog went hunting sausages
For breakfast last Christmas week,
His ears were pink, his teeth were blunt
And he’d elastoplast on his cheek
His legs were Chinese chopsticks
His tail made of chewing gum.
He wore roller skates and a T-shirt
With a frying pan stuck to his bum.
This dog spoke many languages
Including German, Dutch and French –
He could fly a plane with his eyes shut
Or sit cross-legged on a bench.
But this old dog was not so lucky
When winter came around;
They sawed off his chopstick legs for firewood
Leaving him far too close to the ground.
The stumpy bits left proved useless
When trying to cross the street –
His chewing gum tail got stuck to the road
And now he’s Kennomeat.
– by John Rice
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