Happiness Week: Review

So they say if you behave happy then you will become happy. Did it work?

…No not really but then it is something you have to do continuously for a long time until it becomes second, then first, nature so it should come as no spurise a single week had minimal effect.

The cat is named. It sits over my shoulder as I type this watching the flicking lights of the screen.

My knuckles have calloused over. The skin is finally healing progressively without the threat of splitting and bleeding as it had done.

The inevitable things happened where they had to happen. I saw the headstrong laid low by their frail flesh. The strong cower due to weak wills that led them to commit to no action. Those who consider life a game to have revealed their strategies and those who wished for eternal balance discovering for themselves what an ephemeral thing it is, requiring unending attendance at every moment, to maintain.

I have things to do but I put them off because the consequences are definitive and lifelong effecting.More minor things I have attended to instead when there was no need. Procrastination…

And I also did this quiz. Idealism and pessimism are but two sides of the same coin. One seeing all as good while the other sees it all as bad. At my core I am an idealist however but I do wish I could temper it with logic. I see things logically but my heart often overrules my mind in personal matters.

http://www.playbuzz.com/josephinemayfield10/which-keirsey-personality-type-are-you

You’re an Idealist! Idealists are abstract and compassionate day dreamers, activists, writers, diplomats, counsellors and healers. You’re the magician or medicine man of all the personality types. You’re a deeply emotional and abstract thinker with cooperative and communitarian goals. You long for deep, meaningful relationships and you constantly contemplate how you can help the common good. You’re guided by strong personal ethics, and you often have an ideology, cause, or way of viewing the world that you take very seriously. You’re easy going until someone challenges your values, at which point you can be the fiercest of opponents. At heart, you’re a natural healer with a great depth of empathy for those around you. As an Idealist, you’re in impressive company! Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, Eleanor Roosevelt, Princess Diana, and Oprah are all famous examples of Idealists!

A number of who were killed… But then being an idealist means not seeing the clear and present danger I suppose or being so open to accepting others that you in no way protect yourself.


What will I write about next? A food review? Prehaps finally get around to reviewing something literary again as I haven’t done that for a long time now. Prehaps a padding ‘short movie reviews’ entry. We will have to see. Don’t pretend like you are excited as I get no feedback about any of these posts usually.

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Happiness Week: Saturday

My cat was very playful. He still has no name. He now has a bald spot on his neck.

My skin is healing.

Watched a ‘let’s play’ through of ‘Life Is Strange’ published by Square Enix (with a very sad reference to their film ‘The Spirits Within’ not being a bad film but a cult classic as if they still cannot let go of how much of a major let down it was both financially and critically for them even all these years later…). It is a game in a similar adventure vein to those of TellTale Games escept you are able to see both outcomes of a decision by rewinding time immediately to see how the other outcome will come across. This actually limits its replay value ultimately as you will just choose ‘the best outcome’ in your first playthrough and not replay the rest of the game to reach these points again. You play as a college girl who has returned to her home town aftera number of years away who discovers she has the ability to rewind time with which she must solve, with the aid of her rebellious childhood friend, a missing person’s case and protect the town from a severe storm arriving in 4 days. It is episodic and only the first episode, ‘Chrysalis’, has been released so far. It has some real promise although the first episode has a number of generic elements (hopefully to be subverted in later episodes) but despite all the side activities you can do it doesn’t have the polish of TellTale Games’ recent releases so far.

I watched ‘The Wind Rises’ / 風立ちぬ / Kaze Tachinu on FilmFour. It is a Studio Ghibli film so it goes without saying it is fantastically high quality. However I understand why, on principle, many political groups took umbrage with a romanticised depiction of the life of the engineer who designed the Mitsubshi A6M Zero plane the Japanese used in World War II. However it is actually more correct to say the film is based on a short story by Tatsuo Hori, with parts of the story Hori based on Jiro Horikoshi with aspects of his own personality (for example the fictional account of Horikoshi’s wife suffering tuberculosis which Hori’s wife actually did suffer from and his chain smoking when Horikoshi was a lifelong non-smoker) amalgamated into a single character as the fictional Horikoshi’s of the film. An excellent film tinged with an awkwardness as you can’t escape that in realising his dream the character ultimately saw his realised dream used for war. The film tries to address this with his dreams where Giovanni Battista Caproni addresses him as a spirit guide but it falls flat due to the real world implications and for once sadly cannot be chalked up as simply ‘cultural differences’ as is the excuse often used when certain aspects of films are viewed unfavourably in different markets worldwide.

‘Forest of Drizzling Rain’ – Another ‘let’s play’ through but of an RPGmaker horror game. It was okay and had an interesting concept but ultimately the story was not well implemented and so failed on it’s potential with some very weak endings and not enough character development.

‘Prinny, Can I Be The Hero?’ – Yet another Let’s Play I watched. An action platforming PS Vita game spin of the Disgaea strategy RPG series. I still have very fond memories of playing the Playstation 2 games in the series but as I never got a PS3 or PS Vita I never kept up with the later entries. The humour is still there but this spin off seems far lighter fare gameplay wise compared to the main series. It looks fun but also quite short if you are not into purchasing download extras.

The Voice – A 16 year old mother from Bridgend. Her mother is in a Wheelchair ticking the sad background that these sort of talent shoes feel the need to shoehorn into their constructed narratives as part of an ‘overcoming adversity’ storyline. It demeans the individuals concerned and makes them figures to be pitied instead of respected in publicising their circumstances and makes it harder for an audience member to be unbiased in their assessment of the performer’s talent. Unfortunately their accents made them sound far duller than… it made them sound dull. And so Bridgend is not only the ‘suicide ring’ town of South Wales but also of tattooed underage mothers. Tidy…

National Lottery game show – I forgot what the name of it was but there was a Welsh couple on it. The guy reminded me of someone I know. They seemed really affectionate and to get on well unlike some of the more nervous couples in previous weeks. It was nice to see though it was clear the wife was the one who wore the trousers in the relationship as she was quite ‘don’t be so self-deprecating’. Also one of the things they were trying to win were proper wedding rings as theirs were from Swansea market. There’s nothing wrong with that just… you just know someone is judging them for it somewhere and thinking the Welsh, as a nation, are poor… which is sadly true as we are paid less for the equivalent work when it is done in England.

Nice relaxing day.


HAPPINESS WEEK IS OVER!

Normal services will resume in due course… or maybe I will do a ‘Misery Week’ which would be cathartic. Or ‘Absurdism Week’ which would be fun. Or maybe I will just leave it a few days and resume the usual update every few days. Maybe even lower it to once a week. Let us see…

Did people enjoy reading this? It seemed to be just the same few points being reiterated time and time again each day over the week.

I uploaded this with mere seconds left before Sunday began. I almost forgot to post it at all. An achievement in time management which I was quite happy with.

Happiness Week: Friday

I’ve got that Friday feeling! Other people didn’t feel that way so I tried to lead the way. Did I succeed or did I fail? It doesn’t matter because its positivity week!

WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP MY WOOBAT EVOLVED INTO A SWOOBAT! 🙂

A very quiet day. Good for focusing on the task at hand. At least I spent it with nice people.

Rugby is on the television tonight. The Wales vs England game. The old enemy. Took our land. Supressed our language. Mined the minerals from beneath our homes for ‘their’ empire for a pittance in payment. No one cared for anything other than this today.  You are not a Welshman if you don’t drop everything and are obsessed with the game shouting a tthe television screen decrying the events and telling ‘your’ team what ‘we’ have to do to win. I don’t watch rugby or care about it but it is on the television and is deemed a national event. I am going to go read some short stories instead… Robert W Chambers’ The King In Yellow is this weekends choice then… Ladies love watching those muscular men in short shorts running up and down a field clutching an egg shaped ball. It is all very symbolic of what fuels their libido… The way they handle those balls you can tell they would make worthy breeding stock and care giving fathers. Shame their egos are bigger than their…

Caryl Parry Jones sums up what rugby is to the Welsh national identity with this Welsh language charity single performed by her character Cameron Jenkins (the ever injured rugby player): Ultimately Rugby is an emotional roller-coaster.

Cameron Jenkins’ charity single as part of his ‘Hwpo Fe Mewn’ appeal for the BGDB charity (Living With Dislocated Fingers).
Don’t forget about our Welsh and International rugby heroes who are suffering with dislocated fingers, because it’s an emooootional rollercoaster.

The general gist of the chorus lyrics are:

‘obviously, (you know)! / Its an emotional roller-coaster /  pop it out and then pop it back in / its an emotional roller-coaster!’

Small cuts have opened on my hands during the day but they will heal now I have time to attend to skincare. Don’t mock this concern as unmanly. Cuts can get infected and become dangerous if not attended to especially with broken skin which is no longer an effective barrier to bacteria, and viruses entering the blood stream. I assure you those rugby players spend far more time on their appearance than the average person on the street e.g. designer haircuts, spray tans, etc. And for their work having massages for physio, access and the time to use the best sports equipment for exercise and support from the top professionals in the healthcare industry. And once past their physical prime they are treated like demi-Gods walking into any pub and finding a beer, free of charge, being offered to them by the lesser orders. ‘Good bloke’ is their title no matter how much of a sociopath they are in person. ‘done great things’ – like carry a ball from one end of the field to the other. These are the modern day warriors on whom society pins its reputation. Prancing primadonnas of great height and strength who drop to the floor and spend months off ‘work’ hainv top of the line privately funded healthcare if they break a toe or finger.

Hot cross buns and tea for supper.

My cat likes to go towards the door as if to escape the house but he stops short. As much as others think he will run away I think he just wants some fresh air. I think you don’t realise how revitalising fresh air is until you don’t have access to it.


One more day of the Happiness Week… burnout. So much to do and so little time.

The week seems to have gone well. Still feel something went wrong at some point though.. No, maybe not… Just have to accept things are not a constant… Not a flat circle… Time is not a flat circle… I want to rewatch True Detective again. If I do then it proves truly that time is a flat circle:

Everything we’ve ever done or will do, we’re gonna do over and over and over again.

Happiness Week: Thursday

I kept my hands moisturised and they were not as bad today. In fact they seemed to have begun healing. REGENERATION OF THE EPIDERMIS!

I ACQUIRED A WOOBAT! 🙂 SOON I WILL BE A BAT TYPE POKEMON MASTER!

I purchased ‘The Rough Guide to Britain’ (7th edition) for £5 from WH Smiths. It originally cost £16.99! BARGAIN HUNTING AND MAKING PEOPLE JEALOUS!

My cat is booked to go to the vet under the name of Totoro, which the cat home gave him, as we haven’t given him a name yet. In my absence a list was made of names for him. They were not what I would have chosen. They want: Alex (of Aleksandr / Alexander), Max (of Maximus or Maximillian), Donovan, Morgan, Maddox, Rhys, Rhett (After Rhett Butler from ‘Gone With The Wind), Matthias (after the character from S4C’s Y Gwyll / Hinterland), Hugo, Benedict (after Cumberbatch), Henry, Oscar, Sky, Radley, Archer, Chance, Darcy, Aramis or Milo. NAMES TO LIVE BY IN ORDER TO PROJECT MISPLACED AFFECTION TOWARDS FICTIONAL FIGURES!

They decided the short list is: Claudius, Augustus or Benedictus. GETTING ANCIENT ROME ON YOUR ASS!

All the Russian names they considered initially are ignored. So no Ivan, Dovlatov, etc, naming. PRAVDA BRAT!

The cat was a stray so Melmoth, after the titular character of Charles Robert Maturin’s novel Melmoth the Wanderer, seems a fitting name. GETTING LOST IN HIS EYES FOR A HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS!

Also a co-worker suggested Spock as she has a thing for the actor Zachary Quinto. She should get her own cat… or a pet rock. SPOCK AND SYLAR SLASH FICTION!

Also someone keeps saying, in an overly dramatic way, ‘Heeeeeelllll – oooooooohhhhh’ when entering a room. I dont know if it is intentionally done to patronise others or is really how this person actually speaks… UNIQUE SPEECH PATTERN FOR THE WIN!

Someone shared a clip of a film I shared with them. Suprised and joyful! SPREAD THE PIRACY OF HUMOUR! YO HO ITS A PIRATES LIFE FOR ME ON THE GOOD SHIP YOUTUBE!

I was very helpful today. Part of a team! Part of a team! Asked if I could to take a moment out of my busy working schedule (sarcastically) to help. Part of a team! Part of a team! TEAMWORK GO! FORM OF ‘SLIGHTLY PERPLEXED FUNKY GIBBON’!

People speak at shouting level stood next to me when its not necessary. GOT TO MAKE SURE YOU HEARD WHAT I SAID BECAUSE IT WAS GOOD!

It’s Happiness Week so everything has to be stated in a positive manner! HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY! JOY JOY JOY!

I had carrot and coriander soup with wholemeal bread! It was filling! I have had it before! NOM NOM NOM!

I was given a waving golden lucky cat! LUCKY!

I acquired 3 tubes of vanilla, sandalwood and lotus scented incense sticks with a burner stand. He tubes were originally £5 each but I got them for £1 each. FREE MARKET CAPITALISM IN PERSUIT OF INNER PEACE! CONFORM! CONSUME! OBEY!


So much positivity… it is a tiring experience. Two more days… What can I say? I will find something…

Emilie Simon – Flowers: A French singer performing in English.

Happiness Week: Wednesday

Remember, although today was just another average day to you, to someone this was the most important day of their life and changed who they are forever.

It was a great day with great people living their lives one day at a time.

The skin on the back of my hands cracked further. Bare knuckle brawling look to them now. I put soothing lotion on them so it’s okay. I get to wear my gloves all day tomorrow so I’m really excited because I will look cool! They’re very nice gloves. Black leather. Fleece lined. Three stitched lines across the black in a classic style and a belt buckle decoration on the wrist. Constant contact with the affected area numbs the pain. I can feel my pulse.

‘Would you like some tea?’ Sure… oh… wait… you were asking that stranger I see… That’s okay I can’t make tea for anyone anyway… The whole Chanoyu Japanese tea ceremony would take too long to perform properly anyway… Russian caravan tea for the win!

More people came to see the cat. He entertained them. Then he disappeared again once it was just the two of us. So much fun. He still has no name. He enjoys chasing and being chased but not being captured.

MY GOLBAT EVOLVED INTO CROBAT! 🙂

I saw a ‘Phantom of the Opera’ dog today. It was a mixed black, red and white furred dog. The fur of the entire left half of its head was perfectly white like the mask in the musical version (unlike the full mask Eric wears in the novel and some film versions). Also a safety conscious mother would not let her daughter go to the other side of the river to find things. They were stood by the bridge connecting the two sides. Such great maternal instinct! She could just sense danger.


So upbeat it makes my hands ache. There are still three more days of this…

Retractions: My co-worker didn’t wear a nasal excretion covered scarf… although today she wore a different scarf so make of that what you will. Also it was the ‘L’ in ‘salmon’ not the ‘D’ she was obsessed with… but I was certain it was the ‘D’ and it makes for a funnier story if it is. Spoil sport…

IMALU – UH UH: So upbeat with added ‘Engrish’ content… Wait for the stole on her shoulders to start singing. Then realise that the hunter killed one of the animal men and was cooking him… except he had turned into a Louis Vuitton padded bag… I like how open to experimentation the Japanese are with their media but at the same time I am weary of some of the excesses they allow too considering what a conservative nation they are…

Happiness Week: Monday

More exercises in positive thinking!

Today my cat sat at the top of the stairs. I go and stroke him. He accepts this for a while. He likes it. He held my arm, kicks at it with his back legs and bites down on my hand as if it were caught prey. What fun playing together we are having!

He preferred to be by himself except when he wanted to be stroked. When other people came in the house he really liked them as they spoilt him and gave him a nice soft covered cat bed. He runs around the house often and broke into my room just to snoop around. None of my books have been damaged which is great news!

It was very cold today. The skin on my knuckles has split and I cannot wear my gloves as they will only dry the skin out more. When Winter passes I will better appreciate good skin care!

AT WORK I CAUGHT A ZUBAT!

I have a low burning headache which reoccurs more and more often because people think I am in the wrong. They are right because they are good people and I know they are good people because they tell me they are. If a large number of people agree about something then statisically they will usually be correct. It’s basic Utilitarian felicific calculus too – ‘The greatest good for the greatest number’. Also if you feel pain it means you are alive still and your body parts have not become necrotised. No painkillers for me then, I’m full of life!

I have no time to do anything pleasurable or to relax in the evening. Life is giving me a hard taught lesson that I need to prioritise what I do and be better at time keeping.Go on life, get in there!

Also I am learning to make shorter entries! No one likes rambling unstructured entries do they? 🙂


More happiness… Can’t you just feel it smothering you with its relentless optimism?

Here’s a song by David Sylvian called ‘For The Love Of Life’.

Happiness Week: Sunday

I got a new cat from Cats Protection! He was a stray and had been there 3 weeks.

They named him Totoro as he is grey and white. He must have reminded someone of the titular character of the famous Studio Ghibli Film. We have tried to think of a name for him but do not know what to call him. He has a patch fur that is much shorter on his right front leg as they had to shave it to give him an intravenous drip.

At the centre we arrived early but the receptionist let us in. There were boys told not to laugh or be noisy. I think only one of them was getting a cat and the other was his friend. They got goodie bags containing balloons and cat masks. Someone came in looking for kittens but they didn’t have any that were ready to leave their mother yet so the woman left empty handed.

We filled out the paperwork and brought him home. I picked up a lot of leaflets about cat care. I also got a car sticker. The staff at the centre think he was ‘the handsome one’.

They gave us a free pocket sized torch toy that projects the image of a mouse on the ground. He liked it. They also gave us 4 weeks free pet insurance and a discount card for the type of food they approve of called Purina.

When we put him in the spare room and opened his carry case he explored under the wardrobe but there is very little headroom under it so he laid flat with his legs out to the side so he could slip under it. He came out a few moments later.
He eats dry food. He drinks water.

He pulled up the carpet in the spare room when we had to leave him alone to get him food and other things. He was sat up on the desk looking at me open the door.

He has gone around in circles time and time again around the house. Often he is following us or playing a chasing game because we are keeping an eye on him. He is often twitching his tail back and forth. Maybe he is like Dr Banner in The Avengers where he is always angry… he doesn’t like shut doors. He runs over to them when they are shut and tries to get to the otherside.

We were given a sample of a spray to put on things to stop him spraying his scent on them. It works.
He is very playful. My relative bought him a ‘fishing’ trype toy with a small dead duck on the end filled with catnip. He really liked it.

When the others had to leave and I was left to hold him while they left I put him down after they left and he waited and then attacked my arm. He did not have his claws out and meowed at me.

He is very hungry. He is very high strung because of all the new noises. He doesn’t like the sound of the toilet water system after the toilet has been flushed. He waits outside the doors waiting for you.

Though I blocked access to my room, with a laundry basket, he still went in there and tried to go under the bed but I had blocked it with all the cases of books I have. I like to read. I have many books. He does not understand the concept of a door opening as I would swing it back and forth and he would try to scratch under it.

He has a high pitched meow. He runs up and down the stairs. He likes to sit at the top of the stairs. He likes to lie down in the centre of the kitchen and in the centre of the living room. He goes up on the chairs. He likes to explore. While exploring behind the television and furniture he got a lot of cobwebs all over his whiskers. He doesn’t like sudden sounds. He likes to be stroked a lot. He will insist on it. He is a big boy. He is very tall when he stands on his hind legs. He often has looked over things to see what is on top of them.


If you did not read this in anything other than the voice of a five year old this was less that an absolute sucess. So…This week, every day, there will be happy cheery updates because… Happy Happy Joy Joy! Happy Happy Joy Joy! Happy Happy Happy Joy Joy Joy! Once when I was jobseeking a member of a recruitment agency insisted I smile. She waited 5 minutes for me to do it. It was an abuse of power but isn’t it wonderful that she cared enough that she forced someone down on their luck to conform to her perception of reality rather than acknowledge the difference in our current situations. I’m sure she went and found someone in a wheelchair and told themm to dance. Just the kind of ‘kick up the backside’ kind of mentality the unemployed need. Recruitment Agencies are not my favourite industry. (See even that was phrased in a less than negative way because it suggests there are industires i dislike more like… war profiteering). Tomorrow more HAPPINESS!!!