Just Desserts by John Rice

All of a suddlington Major Smythe-Buddlington

Fell from his charger named Rocket

His rifle was broked

And his bum was all soaked

By the yoghurt he kept in his pocket.

by John Rice

I Sat Next To The Duchess At Tea by Anon

I sat next to the duchess at tea.

It was just as I feared it would be.

Her rumblings abdominal

Were simply phenomenal

And everyone thought it was me!

by Anon.

Aunt Carol by Colin West

Making vinegar, Aunt Carol

Fell into her brimming barrel.

As she drowned, my teardrops tricked;

Now she’s permanently pickled.

by Colin West

There Was A Pop Singer Called Fred by Max Fatchen

There was a pop singer called Fred

Who sang through the top of his head.

It came as a blow

When the notes were too low

So he sang through his toe-nails instead.

 

by Max Fatchen

An Explorer Named Mortimer Craft by Mick Gowar

An explorer named Mortimer Craft,

While in Africa ate spiced giraffe.

The effect of this food

Was a sound deep and rude

And green flames that shot out fore and aft.

by Mick Gowar