Sometimes It’s Better By Bus… by Mike Harding

Why does the hirsute chimpanzee

Swing pendulous from tree to tree?

He thinks it probably less fuss

Than waiting for the hippopotabus.

And yet the hungry anaconda

Through the trees is known to wander

Though the jungle bus is often late

It’s better than being ate.

by Mike Harding

The Idle Yellow Oozit by Mike Harding

We have a Yellow Oozit

What lives behind our sink.

It lives on cold nail varnish

So its eyeballs are all pink.


It does no work this Oozit,

It’s as idle as can be,

But this is not surprising,

Cos it’s got no hands you see.


There’s an idle Yellow Oozit

To the North East of the sink.

And we love our idle Oozit,

A lot more than you think.


by Mike Harding

I Saw A Mouse Set Cheese Traps by Mike Harding

I saw a mouse set cheese traps

One morning after tea.

A fly read the flypaper

And though it seemed strange to me,

A cat burglar was stealing dogs

And right across the street

A lollipop man was being licked

From his head down to his feet.

by Mike Harding